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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ximenes
Although that IS funny....It still makes me really sad that this is what peoples preception of Paganism is. Really sad!
GUYS! Paganism is nothing to be afraid of....and all that CRAP you see on tv is bogus as hell. No drugs, no orgies, no frolocking through the fields and hugging trees. Good lord LOL! You guys would have had no clue if I hadnt said anything.
and yeah...ive been told I act too old and responsible. LOL. No joke.
WELL I deff went off topic there...
Posh. You dont want too much...you just are tired of normalcy. Women want a guy that can sweep them off their feet. Someone different. Someone to show them things they have never seen before. Make them feel things theyve never felt before. It's the same reason women like an accent. It is different to them. Who the hell wants the same crap all the time...not me. I want a girl who is unlike anyone I have ever met. I see her pic and it just makes me smile. She brings out the guy I never knew was in me out. 3am...LETS GO TO THE BEACH! We go...get drunk of champagne, run around in the water and end up making love and sleeping in a sleeping bag on the beach. That's where it's at!
I like yur girl already. Someone who doesnt go for the norm is a turn on for me. But I also wouldnt be sitting there chatting her up either. I'm actually a pretty shy guy. But if I liked what I saw...I would keep eye contact, wait for an invite, and do something out of the ordinary. Not...Hey. "Whats yur name? Thats a beautiful name. What do you do?" LOL. So sad...
Lum: we know you're having fun on RG as well. As for the pagan piece, hey - if it works for you, that's great!
Posh/Victoria talks about money and what women look for. How about the male perspective.
I have been in a relationship for many years, but if I wasn't in one, I know what I would look for. A woman who is inteligent, kind, respectful, genuine, attractive and fun to be with. Personally, I find women who are overly superificial to be a complete turn-off.
I understand that women typically want to be in a relationship with a guy who has his act together and has goals to advance hmself. Too often, my women friends have complained about being in relationships with guys who lacked ambition and drive.
At any rate, just some observations from me...;)
Personally I think the gent in questions has some serious self-image issues.
I work with/around State Dept wonks, and as necessity need to go to various embassies. Inevitably I get to talking with some up and coming Foggy Bottom hottie. The talk runs to the "What do you do" part.
When I say I am a DoD GS15, their eyes get all sparkly etc. Even when I say I am married for 20 years the look continues. When they get specific about my job and they learn I carry a gun for a living I get the "Oh, that's nice".
Now keep in mind I could give a rodent's donkey what the vapid twit thinks of me, my line of work, my choice of shoes or anything else, but it is amusing.
I fail to see why the guy was so upset over a recation of some chick who will have ZERO impact on his life.
Pagan huh?
What gods do you have in your home altar? Who do you make offerings to? Any sacrifices involved? How about the usual festivals?
You do any of those Luma?
:lol:
Quote:
Originally Posted by $~mLuMaN83~$
"Oh, of course! It's all about you, isn't it?" - Sir Alexander Dane.
@pug/anubi,lollll, aint it the truth.
@posh and everyone else thats on topic,
this topic has been beat to death from cosmo to details, there is no end in sight for it and the only agreement most columists reached is that as time progresses and the social norms become less of a mainstay, obviously (proven in this thread), people start to leave their circle an head towards those areas which are new and exciting to them. look at it this way, 50 yrs ago if a white woman was to date a black man there would be hell to pay, on both ends, depending on where you are that is still the case. it is not new that people have their opinions of who they want as a partner in life, and they sometimes shoot for the stars, is that wrong? nah, likely to happen though? probably not. American culture has been changed with the new era, new generation and lack of self control.
since when is it deemed stupid to settle down with someone who you believe is in the same class as you? as one poster stated he went to a party and was out of their social circle, do you think you partner wants that everytime, or vise versa, finding someone who is rich and attractive will surely make your life easier, but what happens when their friends meet you and give an "oh, thats nice" and you think youve accomplished something, when in relation to them you havnt.
As anubis stated, if you look for someone who is smarter than you, or at the very least equal, you have no issues, because if their smart enough they will look at you with the same eyes.
Also, as far as that gentleman is concerned with your friend, anyone, anywhere, talking to anyone would b defensive. maybe your friend had a little too much to drink, or wasnt very into him, maybe the best thing to do would have been to be frank. she put herself in that situation. what would have happened if he gave he that response to her profession, it would suck wouldnt it.
i touched on this earlier, but i want to reinforce it. looking for someone who is "perfect" is stupid, its a disney fantasy that doesn happen in real life, you have to settle, and if you do not, thats fine too, its your life, if you want it to be loveless so be it. age is a huge factor, but not the decieding one. most people eventually grow up and come around, but they usually find someone they do not want to be without. everyone comes with faults, we wouldnt be human if we didnt have them.
Lol, i like Posh. Luman, your a surfing hottie, youll do allright!Quote:
Originally Posted by Posh
I think this issue is uncomplicated. Many women judge each other based on how successful their man is... the same way men judge each other based on how beautiful girl they have.
Thats why you rarely see a beautiful woman with a "hot" man... you see them with powerful, rich or intellectuals, artists, guys like that.
I asked a girlfriend of mine what was the most important thing she looked in with a man... nice smile? funny? firm and tight buttocks?
"I need to respect him" she said, and that made a lot of sense for me. I understand perfectly well why your friend lost interest Posh.
We judge girls on appearance all the time, we should expect to be judged back on accomplishments. And we know this don`t we, we are discussing this on a forum for fake watches. ;)
hrm..Quote:
Originally Posted by sebbi
in the US, I don;t see much of what you speak of
i see beautiful women, with shallow beautiful men..
only time i see beautiful women with 'intellectual' men, it's usually your stereotypical 'in it for teh cash'
but, as with all over generalizations.. there are plenty of exceptions..
just saying more than 50% of the time, that is what I see.
oh, they'll tell you til they're blue in the face that they arent superficial like that, but many of them are.
then again, many are not.
theres all sorts out there...
3:30 isn't for another 10 min man..Quote:
Originally Posted by czarczar
and.. the whole while, it seems... you are on the 'geek...
ah, that's a pleasant image in my head.
Thank you thank you thank you Luman!
For taking this little thread that could, embellishing it with your many pearls of teen wisdom, and turning it into the masterpiece that it is now. :D
This is the topic that always makes me cringe and say "o.k. - here we go". There's an unfortunate truth in my profession that is best illustrated in the joke -
Q: How do you know there's a pilot at your party?
A: Don't worry - he'll have already told you.
There are several of us that when we're out on the road together we make up all kinds of funny stuff. The latest is that we are "regional salesman for a casket company".
The looks after that are priceless! And ya, we get "thhaaaatttss niiice" .
I guess sometimes that response is also akin to "I don't know anything about your industry, so I can't even sound intelligent enough to ask you more about it". I haven't read through all three pages of comments, but I certainly know that I have personally said "that's cool (or nice, or interesting, etc., etc.) when it wasn't meant as a brush off or lack of interest, just more the mental knee jerk of I can't figure out a proper follow up.
However, on the other topics of mate finding, there are certainly numerous studies out there that show that the things men find most desirable in a mate are almost inversely proportionate to what women want. One in particular listed: Looks, Good in bed, Potential good parent, Financially stable, Good provider. Men found those traits in a mate preferable in that order. Women, just read that order in reverse. I don't necessarily think that's being shallow. In many ways I think that's probably years of nature and nuture programming our brains and DNA.
I can only add in my own scenario, the end of my first marriage began after my financial situation changed. I became a victim of AIDS (Aviation Induced Divorce Syndrome). After 9/11 my ex wanted me to go back to old job selling box sealing tape for 3M. When I refused, well. . .anyway, she obviously didn't see me as a provider or financially stable anymore.
Many of the previous posters touched on one of the important factors in finding a mate - compatibility. Having similar goals for life and ideas for getting there are very important.
Wow, this topic has legs and it's getting up and walking around on them.
I must agree most with Sebbi because he really pared it down to the bare essentials. Men do want a woman who is attractive and a woman wants a man who is able to provide. That's the way it's usually worked. Some people have lucked out and been able to be very attractive and very brilliant (moi!) and been able to find that in another person. It's a really tough combo which is why it seems so often that we are all settling in some way.
Now, I also see what Waffle is saying about American sensibilities, as we can't really comment on the world at large. Here, it sometimes appears as if no matter what you have to be with someone attractive no matter the gender or their accomplishments. Hot people inevitably team up with other hot people. Although
Sfa437, you kind of reinforce what has been said already and contradict yourself a little bit. Men DO need approval from women in order to validate certain, or even all aspects, of themselves. That woman could be your wife, your mother, a whore or even the embassy interns who work the receptionist's desk. The fact that you spent any time talking with this young professional woman who, in your own words, starts out being a "Foggy Bottom hottie" and then ends up being a "vapid twit" when she finds out what your career REALLY entails and is pretty much done talking to you underscores this especially well.
Novesh, it's not about finding perfection because I believe we are all adult enough to realize that there's no such thing as perfection in anyone. We all want more than the average but to say we're looking specifically for an abstract ideal of perfection is a gross generalization. The fact that we are all looking for OUR own version of "perfect" is much more applicable.
Which brings me back to Luman. Luman, perception sometimes is reality. What most guys on this board project about themselves may in fact not be who they are in reality but it speaks a lot more about how they wished to be viewed or could view themselves psychologically.
People think you're a wannabe Lothario teenage mutant ninja turtle. People think I'm a 40 year-old British chick with a penchant for luxury watches, clothes and bags. Accurate? No, not really. But if that's the image YOU give off, then you can't blame people for basing everything they think about you on that. You also have nothing to prove to anyone on here. A man secure in himself doesn't need people to vouch for the content of his character ANYWHERE. His words and deeds will speak for him. It's just a forum to chit chat about faux luxuries and have a good time losing money in the Casino.
And the bad part about people who look really young when they are really young is that they DON'T age well. And if you do not believe me, look at Ricky Schroeder, Mickey Rooney, Neil Patrick Harris, Gary Coleman, Leif Garret and Danny Bonaduce; time has NOT been kind to them. That's your future. Embrace that or embrace Botox now.
Pugwash, that Alexander Dane quote was right on time.
Posh..No...what you said really hit home to me. For real. I'm not sure what triggered it but alot ha changed personally for me recentley and This whole."preseption thing makes me really think about things. I know ME and my good friends know ME but still. My life has 180'd in the last 2 years. Out of a 4 year relationship, single, good lookin, confident, and pushing for a really rewarding carrer and have changed myself and "grown" ALOT!!!...something you said just makes me think. About what i'm not sure but it has actually been on my mind today.
Maybe yur like a super human mind reader and yur gettin all in my head with the purpose of ruining me hahahahaha! Ok I gotta get out of this thread while I still can.
Posh;
One can be smoking hot with an empty head. Glamour and brain power are two separate and distinct traits, although my wife has both in spades :D
The point I was trying to make was that for 30 minutes, I was getting hit on, despite my being married. Now I'm not going to lie and say this doesn't make me feel good- of course it does. I scored a major league hottie (see brunette in my avatar) but knowing I still have game after 20 years of marriage is an ego boost- and if there is something around here more important than my ego I want it caught and shot :lol: :lol: (Hitchiker's Guide to The ****** quote)
However the State Dept. types don't like people like me (in general). They're more along the peace, love and fahrfegnugen lines. Now I'll run that course until someone starts shooting at me, then the cage door opens :lol:
What mystifies me is why someone should be so superficial to give the "Oh...... that's nice" with the half turn away after 30 minutes of spirited, intelligent conversation because I carry a firearm. When she thought I was a GS15 diplomat I was the bees knees. When she finds out I am the GS15 responsible for protecting 50% of the people in the room and keeping them alive in a very hostile environment I turn into Fat Bastard eating babies.
Either way it has zero impact on my life. It's not something that takes up hours of my day (if you hadn't brought it up LOL) or leaves me wallowing in self doubt, just one of those things where ya have to say to yourself "WTF".
In any case the guy over-reacted big time. My advice to him would be to get over himself, if he wasn't what she was looking for who cares? The next one down the line may be the RIGHT one :D
Quote:
Originally Posted by $~mLuMaN83~$
Thank all my college professors and good genes for the remarkable insight into people's psyche. :D
HAHAHA! We are more alike than you think Posh...:)Quote:
Originally Posted by Posh
For some reason, on a personal level, I have become less impressed with people's professions as I get older. I don't really know why this is, just that when I was younger and going through university having that 'title' and the big office in the future meant more to me at the time than it does now.
+1 to that noteQuote:
Originally Posted by josevancouver
I think I know why - I know too many corporate idiots who I have little respect for who could 'fit' into the ideal some (some) women find appealing.
Quote:
Originally Posted by spekoli
Man, I was going to sign up until you said that :)Quote:
Originally Posted by $~mLuMaN83~$
[QUOTE=banshee35;346236][QUOTE=$~mLuMaN83~$;344685]
GUYS! Paganism is nothing to be afraid of....and all that CRAP you see on tv is bogus as hell. No drugs, no orgies, no frolocking through the fields and hugging trees. Good lord LOL!LOL!Quote:
Man, I was going to sign up until you said that :)
I think this thread has served it's purpose. It has gotten the attention it was intended too.:rolleyes:
Wow. This thread has been **** on.
People who impress me the most are those who humbly serve others, behind the scenes, with no strings attatched. The genuinely altruist, kind person who sacrificially gives of their talents, time, and perhaps even money to help those who need it. the kind of person who passes no judgement on the begger on the street or the well to do drug addict. I wish i had more of that in me. Now don't get me wrong i make an effort but work, family, kids consume the majority of a day.
Regarding relationships, the thing that attracted me to my wife (other than her brilliant green eyes) was independence. I finally met someone who really did not need something from me other than love and acceptance. Oh is that so attractive to me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hoochman
+1 to Hooch
You just nailed what it's all about!!!!!
Hooch is now my LIFE sage - but Dave is still my WATCH guru!!!;)
Cheers, RICK
Quote:
Originally Posted by hoochman
When I can send all three of my children to The Hopkins School, Sarah Lawrence (my mom's old stomping grounds), Sweet Briar (my grandmother's college) and Oberlin (my daddy's alma mater) with love and acceptance, let me know . . . ;)
posh what is it that you do for a living i wonder?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Posh
Well you can get 'that' if you are looking for materialism from a relationship.
Are you sending them to the above schools for you or for them? Is it a strong maternal instinct? If so good. But I think your measuring stick for being a good mother could be measured differently
I've been with many a woman who saw dollars signs in their eyes while we dated, somehow I just couldn't seem to love them enough or come to the conclusion to marry. Maybe it really isn't about them. I just wanted to love someone not be the 'answer' to all 'problems' imaginable.
Afterall there really never is enough money regardles of your tax bracket and you really cannot instill happiness, self worth, esteem, value, security into someone who does not already have it. I think in the bet case scenario you could compliment it but beyond that it really unfair to ask that of your partner. I think the most valued thing I could give my wife is unconditional love and acceptance.
Posh you always post interesting, well thought out post. And lets say i find you intruguing, exciting / erotic perhaps stimulating is a better word... I don't know if your intent is to radiate materialism but it does come accross that way. I supect there is a humbler side of you and that would be not as fun obviously on an internet forum.
I had to smile when I read this. On a message board like Repgeek, one can always try to project who they are, who they want to be, or simply create a caricatre of themselves to drive discussion. I enjoy reading Posh's posts/comments. I'm trying to decide whether I miss her strap wristshots more though;)Quote:
Originally Posted by hoochman
Quote:
Originally Posted by hoochman
couldn't agree more
Driving discussion is something I'm more than up for, really. But provoking deeper thought into what drives us daily is even more interesting.
As far as personas or facades go in Internet forums, I'm not that much different from what you gather I am on here. I believe I'm an intelligent, caring, strong-willed, moral, luxury-minded religious enough hot young half-shicksa goddess with a very loving heart and a modest nature who teaches yoga and pilates when I'm not saving clients from certain doom. ;) What I am NOT is a ditzy, shallow, weak, superficial, slutty Anna Nicole Smith acolyte with my head stuck up my @ss, wondering what's in it for me.
As far as what I want for my own future and the that of my future children is the same life my parents gave to me and my sister. We had a wonderful childhood filled with all the things children want and need: affectionate married parents who encouraged learning and gaining knowledge and let us be ourselves while still giving us gentle discipline and structure. No abuse, no molestation, no oversheltering. We went on family vacations to Disneyland, Disney World, Europe, China and South America. And I even got the chance to spend my summers living in Italy with my aunt. We were great kids and for that our parents gave us everything we ever wanted. When I turned 18, I got a brand new Jetta. When I wanted a cell phone, I got it. When I wanted new clothes, I got them. Same way with my sister who got even more since she's the baby. :p
As far as schooling went, we both went to private colleges, but not to our parent's respective schools which I told them I'd correct with grandkiddies. :D That wasn't inexpensive but thank heavens we had parents with the money to cover everything. We didn't have to struggle through childhood or early adulthood. Some people believe struggling through certain things, or even anything, will make you a better person than someone who doesn't. I'm here to tell you that's patently untrue. Struggling turns you in a person who think everything is or should be a struggle to be worth anything. While I respect this line of thinking and don't belittle anyone's hardships, I definitely know the major benefits of having a life that was more idyllic, so to speak. Kids and teens should be able to just focus on learning, growing and enjoying their lives and innocence while things are still relatively uncomplex.
I could be an uneducated, emotionally unstable, drug addled and under-adjusted stripper b*tch with a daddy complex and an eating disorder but I'm not. I thank the strong values and strong union of my parents for that. I'm bringing and giving my absolute best in everything I do whether it be mentally, physically, spiritually and financially. I work hard, I play hard and I especially love hard. But that's because I have been the recipient of the benefits of that, growing up. Parents who don't have a lot of things to argue about, love each other and offer the best they can to their children, whatever that may be, help make this world better by filling it with happy people who want good things for everyone. :)
goodness
Aw, damn. I was just starting to like you, too.Quote:
Originally Posted by Posh
;)
:lol:Quote:
Originally Posted by Pugwash
Quote:
Originally Posted by Posh
Don't really know what happened to this thread.. don't care at this point
but this quote of yours above made me giggle to myself. Nothing like forcing progeny into things that we ourselves didn't want to do. Closing doors of others to keep ours open, etc.
Just amusing is all.
Oh, Waffle, harsh! We'll get a DISCOUNT if we send them there . . . And I can get nice things with that money saved!
True, a bit harsh.Quote:
Originally Posted by Posh
You can get a bigger discount if you raise smart kids, and force them to get financial aid/scholarships/student loans.
... student loans sounds harsh.. but.. knowing they have something at stake.. well.. might motivate them not to... slack off.
I swear, out of all the people i know who dropped out, I swear 90% of them were 'mommy and daddy paid for 100% of my schooling, this is great, its like a vacation'...
or an even bigger discount if you raise 'stripper whatever daddy complex' kids as mentioned about... schoolings real cheap then :)
:)
My $0.02 on oberlin... nice school... but... FFS, its in the middle of Lorain County Ohio..
what? havnt heard of it? well.. lets see... i think theres some cows..
hrm.. a bit too far west for the amish in ohio.. but.. um... maybe a gas station..
um.. very flat...
see where I'm going with this?
I addressed this. I didn't slack off because my mom and dad paid for all our schooling; that's wasting money and my mother's favorite saying is never throw good money after bad. They ingrained the value of education in us when we were VERY young.Quote:
Originally Posted by roflwaffle
And most great schools are in weird areas. My uncle went to Grinnell College and that's in Bumf*ck, Iowa. But it's a fantastic school that I actually was going to go to until I changed my mind about my major.
YOU can make your kids take out loans to pay for their school. MY kids never will. I will pay for their education until they say they are done with being educated. Simple as that. They will not start life off in debt.
What's at stake for them is my love, approval and respect. I own you. Don't defy me.
NO MORE WIRE HANGERS!!!!!!!
I think you missed the point..Quote:
Originally Posted by Posh
you had commented on sending them there 'for the discount'
which you may have been midly joking about.. just pointing out if money was a concern, there are better options...
yes, its a good school, and good that you understand it is in the middle of BFE, but if little johnny wants to be a doctor or engineer, or whatever oberlin is *not* known for, forcing him to go to oberlin is kinda silly.
And I wasnt commenting on *me*, I havnt stated what I plan for my progeny..
and, i just have to poke a bit more
'they wont start their life out in debt'
oh, but i disagree... they will be indebted... to you rather than a bank..
and emotionally rather than financially..;)
I would say that most great schools are usually in rather good locations... (ivy league, 7 sisters, johns hopkins, MIT, CMU, etc etc) at least... not in the middle of nowhere ohio (which is only slightly better than nowhere iowa)...
guess it all depends on how you rank a school...
;)
whats with the no more wire hangers?