Quote Originally Posted by Emperor Penguin View Post
Agreed, but you still cannot deny that there are couples out there who have done everything you have suggested, yet still divorced. There are anecdotes to substantiate your claim, just as there are anecdotes to substantiate the contrary.

There are no cookie-cutter solutions to succeed in this whole marriage matter, and you know it. I submit that there is no universal secret to succeed in marriage, and that alone would conclude convincingly that success in marriage is indeed a craphsoot.
Just what kind of marital issues are you referring to exactly? There's almost nothing that cannot be be repaired as long as the two individuals involved are COMMITTED to making their marriage work. If one person or both people decide that everything is "too hard" to work on (and I don't mean abuse or addiction situations), then it's going to fail. The media is subconsciously and consciously telling people that nothing is worth saving. That old TV isn't worth saving; that car is three years old and not worth hanging onto. Your husband pissed on the toilet seat. Don't put up with it. Divorce him. We are now at the point that even the people in our lives aren't worth trying to reconcile with because there is something better waiting for you at the club. That kind of thinking is destroying relationships in America.

Most everything I mentioned earlier one should look for in husband or wife are things you look for BEFORE you get married, not after. If you marry someone with YOUR VALUE SYSTEMS and a problems arises, you can work through it. If they do not have those values, your relationship will fail. If the person you married saw fighting, strife and divorce in their families, the seed is planted that at the first sign of problems in their own marriages they should leave. Anybody with issues going into a relationship is going to bring trouble at some point. Guaranteed. People don't even feel obligated to stay because of their children which is more scary than anything else.

I don't think there is any obstacle that cannot be overcome in a marriage, short of abuse and addiction. If you leave for any other reasons than that, especially when there are children involved, I think you're making a terrible mistake. But by all accounts of the media, there's something better waiting anyway so go ahead.

And for your information, it's not just women bringing baggage onto the plane that is a relationship because men have a matching set along with them too! It sounds very much like you are one of those men. Who hurt you or what did you see that made you so cynical and jaded about marriage or relationships in general?