Endless Love: Marriage dead? Why?

[roflwaffle]

That's cool. I respect that but can I speak to Mrs. Pugwash for a second? Go get her and bring her to the computer. You there, Mrs. Pugwash? Okay, good. YOU WON'T GET ANY ALIMONY! Alimony ensures that a man (or woman) continues to make the payments even if he decides to get a newer model. That is all. LOL

hrm.. alimony makes me sad.. its a step in the wrong direction.. and any couples who need crap like that.. starting on a bad foot imo. and even without alimony, women are statistically very likely to still get a good freaking chunk through divorce filings... planning out your divorce before you are even married just sounds horrible to me.

I agree with this. But if you're married, shouldn't you stop dating? Or you into that polyamory stufff?

now, i never said that said person was actively out looking... at all.

I just said that many people get married because they think they found 'the one' as 'obviously' someone you get along with great.. must be the only person in the world for you...

then finding out later that it is not the case..

completely excluding the actual presence of a third party.. just that there *is* someone else out there for that person.. somewhere.

so while marriage is a grand thing.. if you are miserable.. and cant work it out... there are people out there tht can make you just as happy.

i dont hope that for myself, but of course i am not one of those people that would get married after only 6 mo of knowing someone... as at least one of my friends has...

we see that a lot more these days... 'oh we met 3 weeks ago on match.com, and now we are engaged'

reads to me like 'we both fear that nobody else in the world would live with us, so we are settling for one in the bag asap... ' or 'i believe if you find someone you love, thats the 'one' person meant for you' as i said before.. both of which are entirely unture.

this is not to say that the '6 week of knowing someone' marriages are doomed, or cant be happy, just that marriage is a lifelong committment (ideally) and such decisions cannot possibly be well figured out in such a short time.

hell, I'd give more thought than that as to what tattoo i'd get, and thats hidable, and not likely to nag you, or take half your possessions and control of your kids

LOL

[Posh]

hrm.. alimony makes me sad.. its a step in the wrong direction.. and any couples who need crap like that.. starting on a bad foot imo. and even without alimony, women are statistically very likely to still get a good freaking chunk through divorce filings... planning out your divorce before you are even married just sounds horrible to me.

now, i never said that said person was actively out looking... at all.

I just said that many people get married because they think they found 'the one' as 'obviously' someone you get along with great.. must be the only person in the world for you...

then finding out later that it is not the case..

completely excluding the actual presence of a third party.. just that there *is* someone else out there for that person.. somewhere.

so while marriage is a grand thing.. if you are miserable.. and cant work it out... there are people out there tht can make you just as happy.

i dont hope that for myself, but of course i am not one of those people that would get married after only 6 mo of knowing someone... as at least one of my friends has...

we see that a lot more these days... 'oh we met 3 weeks ago on match.com, and now we are engaged'

reads to me like 'we both fear that nobody else in the world would live with us, so we are settling for one in the bag asap... ' or 'i believe if you find someone you love, thats the 'one' person meant for you' as i said before.. both of which are entirely unture.

this is not to say that the '6 week of knowing someone' marriages are doomed, or cant be happy, just that marriage is a lifelong committment (ideally) and such decisions cannot possibly be well figured out in such a short time.

hell, I'd give more thought than that as to what tattoo i'd get, and thats hidable, and not likely to nag you, or take half your possessions and control of your kids

LOL

A lot of people are scared of being "alone" and that's a part of being human.

People get touchy about that online dating thing so I'm gonna leave that alone. I have problems with it but there's people that swear by it. So I shrug and say whatever works for you.

[diablo2112]

People get touchy about that online dating thing so I'm gonna leave that alone. I have problems with it but there's people that swear by it.

Online dating totally and completely blows. Terrible way to find a potential mate. Unfortunately, my personal circumstances make this basically the only available choice. If there was any other way, believe me, I'd take advantage of it. And I'm still single after half a decade, so you can judge whether it's working.

I'm trying another method, which is a bit odd. More on this in a few months, then you'll all get to see how it works.

[Kollektor]

A lot of people are scared of being "alone" and that's a part of being human.

People get touchy about that online dating thing so I'm gonna leave that alone. I have problems with it but there's people that swear by it. So I shrug and say whatever works for you.

Thank you, Dr. Laura!